When I Need A Pick Me Up, by my friend Ryan King

Sunday, August 26, 2007


I've spoken about this friend of mine before, and I need to vent about him again.

To anyone else, I would suggest they excise the following type of person from their life;

Everything is "bad" with this guy. He sees the wrong in everyone and everything. He bullies us in his friend-group, slings insults, and struts around with his knuckles dragging. He constantly compares his fitness against our chubbiness, his meager one inch height difference above mine, his fighting abilities, his this and his that. It's like he lives his entire life in competition with everyone, and he always has to be the best. Once when we were gaming, I was about to make a decision that would adversely affect his PC, and he threatened to leave. I lost a LOT of respect for him that night.

But you might ask why I hadn't lost any respect for him before that night if everything I described has been his modus operandi? Well, mancrush, that's why. I admired him for his masculinity and his strong personality. But now I'm just seeing his qualities as toxic. My mancrush on him died a while ago.

So throughtout the day, he rang my phone three times, leaving a message once, so he could 'commiserate' some bad news with me. The bad news did not pertain to him, it pertained to My Hero. Something was promised to My Hero and the result fell pitifully short of what everyone who cared had expected. Fortunately, I already knew how far short of the mark the promise would fall, because we were dealing with an unreliable source to begin with. So I had not been looking forward to the promise anyway. But the sci fi community is up in arms about it.

Now let me clarify. This friend in question doesn't even like My Hero. Despite everything that he knows about me, and my relationship with My Hero, he refuses to even try. He doesn't respect my opinions about My Hero, nor trust my judgment about My Hero. He just refuses to accept My Hero because His Hero didn't win.

So why did he try to reach me three times today to tell me what an awful deal My Hero got, and how he feels bad for him? Because he is drawn to bad news like flies are drawn to steaming piles, that's why. And because he wanted to gloat under the disguise of commiseration. And because he's toxic and unhappy.

But My Hero? The movie wasn't the prize for him. The love of people who care for him and support his dream to do good in the world--that's the real prize. Go check him out at his convention appearances and he'll show you for himself how much he appreciates you.

Too bad my toxic friend can't see that. But given his nature, he wouldn't anyway. Sad. This friend actually used to be one of my heroes.

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