When I Need A Pick Me Up, by my friend Ryan King

Sunday, July 27, 2008

A Bit Of Anxiety Indulgence

Because I had to go and read this article on my Yahoo Mail Main Page.

Because they survived, I will continue with my plans, and would even do so if they didn't, but it does open the door for ghosts of Worst-Case Scenario Man to whisper sweet dreadings in my ear.

I leave tomorrow morning at 6 AM. If for some reason my plane does not take me home safely, and I never walk soil again, I'll tell you right now, it will suck and it'll have been the worst way imaginable for me to go out (which is why I can't watch the phenomena of the TV show LOST, what with all that effing flashback to their plane crash) but on Monday night, with it having been all over with and it only existing anymore as just news articles and film footage and impassionate news reporters' words as they move on to their next topics, like the pulling of a bad tooth, I will thereforth be experiencing relief. Mourn me, curse the world for it's unfairness, pour one out on the ground for the departed, but believe me when I tell you--this last month of my life has had me living my dreams and I'm quite okay with it coming to an end on a high note.

And with me being dead, I now have all my questions answered. Was I gay? Is God real? Did He love me? Did He take me to Heaven? Was there a Hell?

And all my challenges are over. Would I ever find love? Would I learn to manage my finances to assume the life of an independent adult? Would I ever have made a child? No longer an issue. No longer a problem.

So, I leave you to your own coping mechanisms. As for me, I appreciated every one of you. You enhanced my life. You made a difference on Planet Earth, if only for the life of One.

But I still hope I'm around to blog on Tuesday because I've got some AWESOME pictures to share!!!! :smile:

1 comment:

The Neighbor said...

Just so it's said - your worst case scenario was one in which no one was killed or injured.

Just saying . . .

Glad it went well.