Well, I threw it down. A Neighbor in my neighborhood opened up a message board for alla us up in the hood, (that person wasn't Manhattan's Peak, but through her I learned of it) and in introducing myself I ended saying "And I like guys. A lot."
These neighbors of mine might follow me on twitter some day, you know, where all of everybody else does? So one day one of them just might follow up something gay about me and it just might get out. And yes, I'm as scared about that as I was about having a Facebook page. Because I don't want to "come out." I just want the world to allow me to do me without judging me or condemning me. And I want to be able to put it out there in the public that I'd like a nice guy to date. I'm not trying to "come out", I'm just trying to live.
In other news, Erica and Grizz, I haven't heard back from Dr. Something-or-Other. Maybe he didn't like me pushing up on his buddy. Because I'm telling you, between the two of them, it certainly would be his biddy I want. (Honestly, they were "buddies" not boyfriends. There's a place in the profile to say if you're single and they both were, whereas they could have made each the other's Partner and shared a profile. So I wasn't crossing any boundaries. Promise.)
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Okay, so yeah, so that's new. The moderator at the new neighborhood message board just greeted me and reacted to a few of my posts without a hiccup. And if I was plain enough in my intro, then he's just "met" me as a gay man.
For the first time, someone has met me *as* a gay man.
ME as a gay man.
I mean, at face value, he's met me and to him I'm gay already. Not explanations needed, none asked for. No apologies for my previous straight behavior, nothing. Just I am what I am to him and it's all good.
And I didn't catch flames and melt away as a result.
Cool.
Yes!
You're on Twitter?
I MURDER Twitter. I LIVE on Twitter. I pic on Twitter. I'm on Twitter right now as I type these words.
And so is the moderator of the neighborhood messageboards, I have discovered. In fact, I became his 500th follower and he awarded me a prize.
Which means one of my active followers knows me as a gay guy. Far as he knows, I've always been out and proud. So at any given moment, he might engage me in a tweet about my gayness that all his peeps will see, or all MY peeps will see if I answer him back.
As I said in the post, these are the terrifying moments. These are the trying times. This is the beginning of outing myself. I did it on purpose--well, I didn't know just how fast and how much ol Neighborhood Boy would take off on Twitter--but I fully intended to just BE and see where that took me.
Erica, you want we should follow one another?
Wait, I didn't finish my thought.
I'm scared.
Okay.
email me your twitter name, please!
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